highf-d-f

=Blue Chaos / High Flying ...=

Design Doc Feedback

 * graphically, the banner is too un-chaotic; needs a wee sting in it
 * good simple story start; make sure it hangs together fully with the game - why 2174? isn't 60% of the earth water anyhoo? how does the our-world of towns+life map onto their world?
 * the small-town-guy back story is always powerful; good initial characters, but you need to populate the world with more, probably.
 * ta for the concept art; it always helps to set a shared mental image; seeing 'James' and 'Kate' begins to build the story; you seem to have a classic physically-strong-male weaker-female which is a good start, as it hides the mental and other faculties; imagery can be used to create illusions you will later dispel in the game
 * I'd add some words to some/all of the storyboard cells to help the reader follow the tale along; you can do anything you want with a storyboard!
 * ta for the music; what you create is your own, so its always a good default; sounds good too!

Overall - its a good start, but needs some level detail added, and an idea of entire game flow across the levels.

draft mark: 45%

final comments - I feel the game better this time - perhaps I'm just reading it for the second time. Good attempts at all parts of the document, including artwork.

final mark: 55%