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=**Introduction to Games Design**=

**Design Docs feedback page**
Michael //Bez// Berryman

http://beneralgerryman.wikispaces.com/GameDesignDoc

Problems with the layout of the document. I reckon it is only a draft, so do quite a bit of work on selling your idea through this document. Firstly, the second image is lost. The first image is OK, but try and hand-draw it; I bet it'll be better than done in MS Paint.

The one sentence is good, and will need beefed up at some time, but it does clearly introduce the idea head-on. Good.

You lost me in the artist statement. Always remember that the reader hasn't a clue what you or on about until he reads your doc. Give him the wrong words and he is lost, or, worse, got the wrong idea. Now, stickman species, is this a feature of your lack of artistry skills? if so, either drop it and find an artist, or beef this section up more clearly.

When you refer to other games, you could throw in some small imagery. Remember: you can scale images on wikispaces.

'Musical Influence' - how weird. But, OK if that's what you mean. You will probably have to beef up the political philosophy bit to make greater sense.

Overall - this feels like bits are missing. What I need to know are: what are the exploding head stickmen traits & why, what is the political philosophy thing, what would a couple of levels play like, how long is the gameplay, how much will it cost, what does it play on, ...

OK. Some of these you may have tackled, but make sure the whole holds well together. If I could apparently contradict myself, it is Ok to confuse the reader if this is your purpose, in order to allow a ta-da denoument later on. This is the 'whats the sound of one hand clapping' routine: confuse, then enlighten. Mebbes try it on this game to see how it works.

//Dr John//